ProudAardvark's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Grasping for the Wind]

Cool piece!

I liked this a lot. You have a great flowing texture, and I also really liked how the delay on the piano flows into the played notes so that sometimes you can't tell which is which. On to the criticism:

1) The harmony at :30 sounded "wrong" me. I believe it is discordant rather than dissonant. You have a number of delicious sounding impressionistic chords throughout that sound very right to me so - if you want this passage to stand out that's fine, but just make sure your being honest with yourself that this is the sound that you want. If it is what you want, consider bringing it back at the end so that it is more memorable and sounds less like a mistake.

2) At 1:27 you suddenly lose a bit of the harmonic tension. It sounds unintentionally weak to me. You might consider smoothing over that spot with a more interesting harmony. (like what you just had a few seconds earlier). In impressionistic piano writing its important to make sure that the tension flows and ebbs in a convincing and smooth manor, in the words of my old harmony prof, "you want surprises, not shocks".

3) 1:44-46 sounds a little weak to me too, harmonically. It just feels like the oomph is falling away from your wonderful impressionistic flowing sound. Make sure this is actually what you want.

4) Loved :44-1:00, wish I had written that :D

Overall, I'm really happy to have discovered your music from the classical review thread.

BlazingDragon responds:

Actually, there is no delay in the piano. Ever single note is played (I have the sheet music to show it! lol)

1) When I first included that chord, it was a struggle deciding whether to keep it or not. After a few listens though, I came to the point of loving it. It might seem abrasive, but I like how it creates a moment of heightened tension before transitioning into the main theme of the piece. Your advice about putting it in at the end makes sense though, and I'll likely try it out. :)

2) Originally, I was trying to do a call and response phrase there, but now that I listen, you're right. The point of that section is to build up to the coming section, but the energy falls at that moment and compromises that purpose. Thank you for pointing that out and getting me to think! I'll see what I can do.

3) I see what you mean, and I'll think about it. My intent was to thin out the texture some and lower the dynamics as if the wind is dying down and passing by. I also wanted to use the poly-rhythm there. Still, you have a good point, and I'll see what changing it sounds like.

4) Thanks!!! :D

I appreciate the in depth review. It is rare that anyone on newgrounds gives intelligent input regarding harmony, and you've given me points to think about that did not previously occur to me. Thank you very much!

[Animus Intorqueo, No.2]

Very nice work

I liked this overall, am only going to comment on problems and things that could be improved possibly.

1) Diminished chord at :28 sounds "out of style" to my ears

2) At :40 I felt that the bass could be a little stronger to support the chord structure. Its possible to add a a lower octave to reinforce the bass and keep some of those figuration in the left hand going. Overall, I'm not feeling like the range of the instrument is being explored. That's ok, but, it sounds like some of your figuration would sound more airy and ethereal slightly higher, more commanding and booming lower.

3) It feels like you are regarding the "left hand" and "right hand" as two separate components here. This is limiting the textural interest of your piece. For example, in the left hand just before 1;00, I'd love to hear another voice brought out. Check out "Doctor Gradus ad Parnasum" from Debussy's children's corner or some of Liszt's flowy work (bord d'une Source for example) for some flowing writing that works as texture and as nested voices. Working with solo piano is a limitation, but I feel you aren't pushing the envelope of the textures you could be using here.

4) An implied extra voice is a great way to make a piano texture sound interesting. In the fast moving figures at :10 for example, I'd love to hear a slower counter melody brought out from within. Even using the same note outline you have now, you could add textural accents. Think in "layers" of sound to give your piece a more engaging texture.

5) At :36 you introduce an extra voice in the right hand that promptly vanishes. I'd love to see some of that texture continue on. Taking the voice away makes what follows seem emptier.

6) 1:20 could really benefit from an eight note counter melody. I think you're trying to make this sound slightly ghostly and mysterious here... I think you could improve the effect by wandering a bit higher into the piano register.

7) Work on your transitions. Make sure musical ideas flow seamlessly together. 1:02 seemed really abrupt to me, as did 1:18 and :48. Listen to some Bach to see how his phrases end and begin at the same time, how everything connects and flows. Make the listening experience smoother. (Again, there are times when being abrupt works, but I didn't think you were going for that effect intentionally as part of your voice)

8) As an add-on to the last point, work on not starting all of your phrases on the downbeat. Have new textures and lines spring up organically throughout the rhythmic structure. It will make everything sound less like its Lurching from idea to idea.

Looking forward to hearing more of your work!

NickPerrin responds:

Awesome review. REALLY helpful.
Thanks!!

[Interstellar Assault]

Nice sound and mood...

I enjoyed this! I can tell you're a big John Williams fan. The only things that sounded slightly off to me were the little virtuosic Xylophone section (sounded unplayable and quantized). Also, when the string harmonics come in, I think you might be happier with the sound if you spread the notes around the orchestra more. For example, two sol violins and a viola on harmonics might give you a more satisfying sound than just a violin section alone. To get the real "Star Wars" effect going, you'll want the wavering woodwind lines to be denser - think texture / orchestral gestures rather than just a counter melody. Very nice work, I look forward to hearing more.

SilentTakedown responds:

Thank you very much for the thoughtful review! Yes, this piece was inspired both by John Williams and Gustav Holst and I had to try the new samples out. I will keep this in mind for future projects! To the woodwinds: Williams uses a lot of runs in quintuples. I wasn't gonna go 100% John Williams so I had to experiment a bit, too. But still I should have got more dense with everything that is true. To the violin harmonics: That's a good idea indeed. Hadn't been thinking of that before. I think the Xylophone is playable because it's only 1 note with a rather fast tempo. If you play it with both hands, even I could do it.
Thank you again for the helpful review! One usually does not get useful advice on Newgrounds.

[Subterranean (lp9)]

Ideas better than this realization of them...

There are some cool melodic ideas going on here, but the quality of your MIDI realization is holding it back a bit. Work on your phrasing, making sure that there are crescendos and decrescendos, bowing changes for your strings etc. Even if your samples aren't fantastic you can still do a lot more. Thanks for sharing this!

Zake1 responds:

Not a problem, thanks for sharing your thoughts!

[[HP] Lakemaster's Den]

Groovy!

It is so hard to write something both simple and good but you've managed it here. Love the composition and the layering. The mix is a little "squashed". I'm getting digital distortion on my speakers, and I don't think you intend it. Ease up on the compression; the song has a soft and introspective mood and doesn't need to be "turned up to 11". Adding to favorites, keep up the great work.

ZaronX responds:

I've a history of winding up with weird distortion when I go for chimey things and then not picking up on it until someone points it out a couple month later. A bit sad I have not defeated that legacy yet, but I shall continue to try! b:

Thanks for the feedback!

[Ballroom, 1899 (NAC)]

Unexpected and Full of lively character!

This made me think of one of those sequences from the 'Muppet show' where crazy people in tuxedos are bouncing around on the dance floor. I love the manic & frantic quality you have going on.

I have a couple of suggestions (I wouldn't be writing a review if I didn't enjoy it though). First, to my ears the composition could use more clearly defined sectional contrast. It started to drag for me after a minute or so. I know you switch to a more woodwind heavy ensemble and then later to some brass, but the strings seemed to give it an overpowering sense of unity that I needed a break from. Some changes in the overall dynamic level could really help, with some crescendos and such.

Second, don't be afraid to let the music pause and breathe a little bit. The waltz can really make use of the "dramatic pause" between phrases. It would break up the composition a little more.

Thanks for sharing this and good luck in the contest!

[bossa nova loop]

Hilarious!

I love this, it has this great sense of cheesy irony to it. Added to favorites. Even the choice of synths backs up that happy laid back feeling: I especially like the "woof woof" in the background (panned right); dunno if that's an extra instrument or a synth fret noise: perfect either way.

(Please Check out some of my stuff if you have a chance)

hjcrbass responds:

Hi ProudAardvark,

glad you liked the happy laid back feeling of it. That was the whole idea. The "woof woof" sound comes from a brazilian instrument call cuíca, it is use in bossa nova, samba, etc.
Thanks for the review!
(PS - I did check out some of your tracks and I like them very much, very cinematic. Keep up the good work!)

[Hypnose (WIP)]

Super cool

I love the buildup and the unusual rhythm: it is just wonderfully off-balance in a good way. Looking forward to hearing the finished version.

[-Jungle Spirit-]

Cool

So, you could probably rock this out more by using some samples that were more "tribal" in sound. You do a good job creating the atmosphere with what you did choose, but the drums sound very "studio" rather than "Tribal" to me. The rhythms are quite cool.

The roars sound a little tongue-in-cheek to me, you could probably get them to sound more aggressive by working in some menacing breathing and more subtle effects and then maybe building up to a roar or something. Just a thought. Thanks for sharing this; please check out some of my tracks if you are so inclined :D

Step responds:

Yeah, I made this when I had bad jungle samples and didn't know how to EQ/barely knew how to add effects. Now if I wanted to I could make some epic jungle song which is out of this world, hehe xD. Ahh, the roars. Now that you mentioned it, I totally agree with you. I'm really picturing a part in this song where the song goes quiet, and slowly builds up to a powerful rhythm with a huge and majestic lion roar. Thanks for the helpful review, it's hard to get one of those nowadays :D. Reviewed your awesome 'Sleepy Village' track, I hope you liked my review :D. I'd say more about the song, but I was out of characters xP. Thanks again, I'm glad you found this song decent! :).

[FarAway-vocals]

Gutsy

The vocals have a lot of potential here; I think you're actually holding yourself back with the mix on the guitar, it sounds a bit "dinky" - its hard to take the vocals seriously in comparison to the guitar if that makes any sense.

To get a better "pro" sound from the vocals, I'd recommend using a vocal compressor and a hint of delay.

Happy to take another listen at some point, rock on. Please check out some of my stuff if you are so inclined.